Magic Mushroom Meditation
Last Saturday I ingested 15 grams of ‘Atlantis’ truffles and lay in a darkened room for three or so hours experiencing the trip that comes with them.
This wasn't some drug binge, the intention was to have something akin to a spiritual experience.
It was meant to be consciousness expanding.
There were of course some hallucinations, but these particular mushrooms are described as follows by the place I purchased them from:
A warm and relaxing body high. Rushes and waves you never felt before can be experienced. Connection with others and mother earth can be felt and often colourful visuals can occur.
For me this turned out to be pretty accurate.
There were some hallucinations, but this wasn't anything like what you might have seen in the movies.
It was far more subtle.
The walls shifted and flowed like water.
Colours became more vibrant.
Distances became harder to judge, the ceiling for example felt further away.
The most striking thing about the trip, however, was the emotional nature of it.
For background music I chose 'Epicloud' & 'Empath' by Devin Townsend, and of course 'Dark Side of the Moon' by Pink Floyd.
Both Devin Townsend albums are very emotional and by the end it felt as if I had just spent two hours in the grip of a warm and genuine hug from Devin.
A one point I was smiling so hard my face hurt, a moment later I was in tears.
It was just pure emotion.
The kind that wells up in your chest and sits there waiting for you to do something with it.
I've experienced a similar feeling at the funeral of an old schoolmate that died tragically, but also at a high energy gig listening to a band I love.
It has been there when I've fought with my girlfriend and made another appearance when we made up.
It was there when my cat disappeared for the whole day for the first time and again when she came home.
Then it felt as if my body ceased to exist - but not in a bad way.
My eyes were closed, the music was soft and in that moment all that existed was my consciousness.
It was like being in a deep state of mediation.
I wondered what it would be like if all humans simply existed as a conscious energy.
Would we still fight?
If we shook off the chains of the physical world would there be any hate left?
I didn’t think so…
As the trip started to wind down I went out into my back garden for a little while. This was the lowest point of the whole experience for me.
Having just last week cleared a significant amount of overgrowth and weeds, the garden felt dead and lifeless.
What may have looked like a messy overgrown garden was actually teeming with life and now that it was gone everything just felt dead.
That was more or less it, though I did write down a couple of things during the height of it, so I will probably write posts based on these thoughts in the near future:
We seem to live life in our peripheral vision
When coming up on mushrooms you will first start to notice things in your peripheral vision. The walls may shift and bulge or you might get a sense that things are flowing around you (watch the movie Midsommar for a pretty accurate representation of this). I got to thinking about how important our peripherals were as we evolved. It's where we notice a potential attacker or physical danger. We're constantly alerted by things going on in our peripheral - so much so that it makes it difficult to focus.
How much of you is society?
This is the nature vs nurture debate - as I floated there as a non-physical being of pure consciousness it felt like I had striped away the nurture part.
What does it all mean?
The experience was definitely more emotional than spiritual - though if you live by the words ‘God is love’ then I guess you could call it experiencing God.
One thing that really stands out from the experience, however, was a feeling of sadness and disappointment that due to our social and legal systems many people will never get to feel how I felt during that time.
I lamented the fact the not everyone had experienced that feeling and that many never would.
I hated anyone that ever deliberately or ignorantly spread misinformation about the nature of a psilocybin (the chemical in magic mushrooms that makes you trip) experience.
I hated that fact that even before I ate them I was nervous because I’ve heard all the stories about people clawing out their own eyeballs because of a bad trip - despite that fact that this was not my first time, that nonsense is deeply embedded in our brains.
I hated how I wanted to tell everyone about the experience but felt like I couldn’t. Even posting this write up of the experience feels socially and professionally risky.
Psilocybin has been used to help people with terminal illnesses, helped people quit smoking and even deal with depression.
It can open your mind and allow you to experience things that you shut out from you day to day life - which for me is evidently the expression of emotion, because I guess I had a lot built up in there.
Are there dangers? Sure, but knives are also dangerous and just like mushrooms I wouldn’t want to see one of those in the hands of a sociopath either. For most people mushrooms will be fine, they just need to be respected.
If you're interested in trying this yourself I would recommend you do some research - I did a lot.
Read up on / listen to Terrance McKenna, or read 'How to change your mind' by Michael Pollan (Also check him out on the Joe Rogan podcast).
Understand what 'set' and 'setting' are, and for your first time don't do it alone. You will want to feel safe, relaxed and comfortable and it's good to have someone there that can help if you start to feel anxious.
Most importantly, enjoy it.